** This thread discusses the content article: OMG! Menopause Has Arrived **

This my first time here, please bear with me.
Here is my situation. I had a hysterectomy in August of 09. So, it's been almost a year. Because of the hyst..I am now in automatic menopause. Because I am 55, i opted not to take hormones. (the doc said because of my age, it was a toss if I took them or not) My husband and I are also self employed and in this economy, it is not easy, any way you look at it. Just in the last 2 months, I have been hit with just about every icky situation you can think of. I had my insurance agent get me in trouble with paying my premiums. He ahd me paying just the minimum and I got a collection notice from the company it's self to pay up or be cancelled. I also found out that my workers comp is grossly underfunded, because this time last year I had 10 employees, now I have 6. But it's not thier job to help me fix it. I got a notice from the state, I forgot to send them my W-2 at tax time. Why? I don't know. they sent a letter and acted like this was a deliberate act. ( I am the only person in the office, I have no helpers, I do it all) I got a notice on my equipment taxes wanting a huge sum of money. All together I think I owe about $12,000, just to these agencies. So my stress level is out the roof. I sat here today and wrote letters to different ones, telling them to get off my back. I know this isn't right, but I'm depressed, I am anxious, I cry all the time. I can't relax on the weekends. I just feel if I am caught having fun, I will pay a very heavy fine. A fine that is not negotiable and is due NOW! We bought a new truck last weekend, because our old car that had 200,000 miles on it, just gave up. I am so nervous I can't enjoy it. I feel like I should go give it back and just drive my junker around a while longer. I don't desearve nice things. Any suggestions? I don't ahve many friends. Mostly because I am always working. I don't have anyone to talk to, no family to interact with. I try to act fine and dandy around my husband, but cry myself to sleep almost every night. Would love your feed back.

Thanks for sharing your story. You really have a lot going on and have a right to be totally overwhelmed. Anxiety is a common symptom not only in menopause but in general. Your financial situation sounds really tough and it's not a big mystery why you're feeling all this excessive anxiety and panic.

When I find myself uncontrollably crying or feeling like I'm going to explode, there are a few things that help me. I know it may sound stupid but when I'm totally stressed out to the point of being emotionally overwhelmed, I count to 10 very slowly. Then, I practice breathing exercises to help me calm down. Try these breathing tips from The Menopause Minute.

The best thing to do is talk with your doctor. See if there is a medical reason. Talk with a stress management person, take yoga classes or meet with a mental health professional. All of these things can be helpful and reduce the feelings you are experiencing. Feeling like you do is OK, but the best thing is to look into things you can do to make it better.

Just joined this group so I know that my reply isn't timely for you but I just want you to know that I can identify with your situation completely. It is one thing to have business, money or just life stress but then when you throw in "menopause" that in itself is a stressor. With that said don't beat yourself up you're going through a lot. I myself am self employed have experienced an 80% drop in income, have the stress of engaging in starting another business and in the last 3 years have had 3 major health crisis's in our family of 4.
I did work with a stress counselor for awhile and she said it was a wonder I was still standing upright. It helped to have her compliment me on how resilient I was in dealing with things and that alone helped me to see myself in a stronger way. I sure hope that things have improved for you, but if you are still really stressed just know that there are others in the same boat and we can all get through it.